When setting any sort of goal for yourself, whether it’s health, financial, or love, it’s important to look at the driving forces first. You have to look at the reasons why you want to change something because the way you approach it will make all the difference. And the question you should always ask yourself is: Are you moving towards what you want, or away from what you don’t want?
This tool has enormous power for understanding your self-labeling process.
Let’s say you have an amazing vision of your body in the future, what you want it to look like, what your weight is, how great you feel, and how amazing your health is. You see it, you want it, you are going to move towards it, and all you have to do is figure out how to get there. Every day you are fighting to get to that point. On average, would the days leading up to that point get better and easier, or would it get harder and harder the closer you get?
Every day you are getting closer to your goal so it will get better. Even if you stumble and fall, you get up and you are closer and you know why you fell. Every day you get more pleasure because you are closer. You are constantly making the decisions to get more of what you want and doing the things that will get you there. Decisions in this “neural pattern” are always based on more right versus less right. If you pick less right, you will realize that in the future, but you will only get less pleasure on your worst day!
90% of the population are moving in an away pattern, they are focused on the things they don’t want. They are moving away from what they don’t want. They aren’t focused on a big, compelling, motivating vision of their amazing body in the future, they are attached to their situation in the present. They are focused on their current health problems, what they don’t like about it, what they worry about, and what they are afraid of. In this pattern, where do these people end up? What do their lives go? Towards the things that they don’t want.
When you are driven by what you don’t want, you will get stuck because you will only get more pain. In that pattern, your best outcome will be less of what you don’t want. You are choosing things that will create less pain for you. The decision process is about less wrong versus more wrong, and naturally you will choose less wrong but that’s a good outcomes in that pattern! On your very best day you will only get less pain, not less pleasure.
Think about how you approach everything in your life today and what you are driven by. If you are in a towards pattern, you will always find more pleasure and ease than if you are in an away pattern.